My Vampire Heart

*bounces in happy, Kaname-sweetness induced hyper drooling*

Sagakure has scanlated and posted Vampire Knight Chapter 52!!!

Read VK 52 on her LJ
Read VK 52 on OneManga


SPOILERS AHEAD

It's a great chapter, some very sweet moments for Kaname and Yuki. And other than the fact that I'm completely and utterly hopeless (more than I used to be, I think writing fanfic has ruined me XD) and kept mentally switching Yuki out for Zero in the scenes with Kaname *ducks but is shot anyway* it was really very lovely to read.

Kaname got to open up so much and it looks like Yuki's finally gotten over / getting over her thing about using her fangs. *nosebleeds quietly and coos at sweet, lovely blood drinking moment*

What Yuki saw/felt in Kaname's blood was very interesting (and sad!) and the scene that followed after was so touching. I think the image of Kaname on his knees, hugging her so desperately with his face buried against her is something that's going to stay with me for a long time. *dreamy smile* I'm so glad she was gentle with him there. *has achy tender feeling in her chest*

I wonder what's behind that door. :S *is both curious and worried* Of course then, I also get an odd feeling whenever I wonder about the door because I'm using something similar in a symbolic way in my "Secrets" fic (although I'm certain what's behind them are completely different! XD) so it just amuses me.

I also liked the new bit of info we're given about the hunters, and how it's pretty much the most powerful who gets to lead because he can rule the others by strength / fear. Actually, it's incredibly much like vampire society if you think of it. *chuckles* They're both running on survival of the fittest.

Given that, it gives you a glimpse of how strong Cross must be since he could have had the position before (and now does have it in name, although Yagari's doing most of the work it seems LOL). It also answers my question about why/how they would be willing to accept Zero as a future president, despite his being a vampire.

LOL although his matter-of-factly agreeing with the guy who was expression doubts about him being a good candidate was cute. As was Yagari's reaction. :D

It was good to see Takuma again too, although I'm all kinds of curious now about what the situation is with he and Sara. Seems like he has indeed been with her the past year, and Kaname knows where he is, whether or not anyone else does. Actually, the fact that Sara remarked on Kaname obviously knowing since the invite was sent to her address makes me wonder if no one else does know. If it was general knowlege, there wouldn't really have been any call for her to make mention of it at all.

If she's kept it kind of a secret, I have to wonder why, since purebloods seem to be able to get away with a lot for the most part. Is it because there might be issues with her keeping Takuma as her pet... uh, *cough* I mean companion 0:) or whatever he is, because of his family? Or just because she didn't want Kaname to know... although he obviously does. Or some other reason perhaps...? *ponders*

I wonder about Takuma and Sara's relationship by this point too. It's hard to tell because Sara looks perfectly comfy, but then, she's obviously in control of whatever their situation is, so she would be. And Takuma's difficult to read because he has that cheerful front he wears so you don't know just by looking at him whether he's in an okay situation or not. I hope we get to see more of what's up with them in the future.

Oh, I love the pic of Kaname with dog/wolf ears in the promo images before the chapter. LOL I can't explain why, but he looks good. :3

Also MASSIVELY like the pic of Kaname and Zero on the next chapter preview. Them sitting next to one another is always hotness, and I can't help immediately noticing that both of their collars are undone / messy. I know this is just because it looks cool, but my pervy little one-track brain looks at that and goes: oh! Look, they were just messing around and drinking from one another, got interrupted and now have to act all formal but haven't fixed their shirt collars yet... XD hehehe I told you I was hopeless, didn't I?

Hm, okay, well, I shall cut my incoherent ramblings short because I have to go, but I will share one more little (unrelated) thing.

I just heard this song, "Help, I'm Alive" by a group called Metric. Never heard of them before, but I caught it in the car on the way home and for some reason some of the lyrics were making me think of Vampire Knight. (possibly because I'm obsessed?) ;D


I tremble
They're gonna eat me alive
If I stumble
They're gonna eat me alive

Can you hear my heart beating like a hammer?
Beating like a hammer?
Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer

Hard to be soft
Tough to be tender
Come take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train
Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer
Beating like a hammer

If you're still alive my regrets are few
If my life is mine what shouldn't I do?
I get wherever I'm going
I get whatever I need
While my blood's still flowing
And my heart still beats...
Beating like a hammer

So, yeah, probably all the blood references doing it. ;D Also the idea of having to be strong because if you slip up you'll be vulnerable to being (hahah literally) eaten alive. The last bit with the "if you're still alive my regrets are few" part also kinda make me think of Kaname and Yuki in this last chapter. The whole song does for some vague reason, probably because I'd just read the chapter and then heard it. ;)

You can listen to it if you want:

Labels: help i'm alive, kaname, music, sara, takuma, vampire knight 52, vampire knight chapter 52, vampire knight chapter 52 scanlation, vampire knight scans, yuki, zero

Posted by Blackened Wing at 8:25 PM | Permalink | Comments

Alrighty! Finally got the next chapter done!

Updated on FFN:

Secrets in the Dark (Zero x Kaname) by Blackened Wing
Chapter Two: "Past and Present"

I had a few things to say, but I totally rambled in the author notes of the chapter itself and on my review responses page, so I won't repeat it again here.

Speaking of review responses, you can find them on my FFN forum here. Thank you everyone!!! :D


ALSO!!!!!! There are some raws of Vampire Knight Chapter 52 floating around!! :D (It comes out early in China) Isilen and Vane sent me linkies this morning and Sagakure now has an awesome little summary (and the links) on her LJ. You can find all of that here.

I'll save my real gushing for when the actual scanlation comes out, but oooo! *bounces* it looks very good. Lots of sweet, kinda vulnerable Kaname moments. *happy sigh* :D


More Lovely Fanfiction Updates

Please forgive me in advance if I've missed someone. I seem to not be getting alerts and messing up my list keeping a lot lately. :P

UPDATED:
The Other Half of Myself - YenGirl
Devil's Pawn - IncaGold27
The Stranger - LightPathetic
Winter's Chill - Kafunshou Queen
What About Us - kanshou87
Offerings - Kamiyashi
Two Hearts Beat as One (used to be: Cookies) - Nineorchids

NEW:
Clouds and Sheets - Clue-sama
Look Away - Sagakure
The Battle Between Two Hearts - darkHeartedAngel26

Go to my Vampire Knight Fanfiction section to find the links to these and other stories.

Labels: kaname x zero, secrets in the dark, vampire knight, vampire knight 52 raws, vampire knight fanfiction, zero x kaname

Posted by Blackened Wing at 3:32 PM | Permalink | Comments

Okay, I have something to share, but you all have to promise not to flame, lynch, skewer or otherwise maim me or the other two ladies who were involved... XD Promise? Okay then...

Here's a silly, absolutely insane little dialog that came about between YenGirl, VaneCaos and myself. It spawned off of Chapter 24 of YenGirl's lovely Kaname x Zero fic "The Other Half of Myself". It will probably make more sense if you've read that first. In that chapter, it's the morning after Kaname and Zero have made love and Zero's encountering a few... issues due to the aftermath. 0:)

In it, he makes a highly amusing mental reference to tampons (poor boy, it is apparently much too fun to embarrass him). Well, someone commented on that in Yen's story, which spawned a conversation and some speculation between Yen and Vane and then Yen and I and then somehow turned into... er... *blushes* this.

Yen wrote the first part, then Vane wrote the second part and they asked if I wanted to write the third. :D Heavy disclaimers on this - it's total crack, honest. Please don't get offended or take it at all seriously. The three of us have all decided that we were collectively, totally drunk when we wrote this. *nod nod* That's our story and we're sticking to it. XD

WARNINGS: This is seriously silly and whacked. It is also semi-graphic yaoi and contains humerus references to body parts and feminine products, so please DO NOT read it if this might offend you. If you read it anyway, and are offended, please don't flame because you have been warned. Oh, and if you are a guy, you may not want to read this either. LOL Somehow I think this is more... uh... girl humor.

Okay, still here? Then here you go. The purple part is Yen's, the blue part is VaneCaos' and the green part is mine. *scuttles off to hide under her couch with her cat* XD

K: *spreads Zero's thighs gently while smiling at him*
Z: *blushes a nice pink and offers a shy smile*
K: *glances down, spies innocuous white string dangling from Zero's you-know-where* What's this, Zero?
Z: *wonders what is Kaname on about and shifts up onto his elbows to look* What's what?
K: *holds up dangling end of string* This...
Z: *blushes a hot red* Uh, that's... uh... *pushes Kaname away, scrambles out of bed and flees for the bathroom*
K: *blocks Zero's way to the bathroom, leaning against the closed door, smiles like the devil himself and pulls Zero to him, seizing his buttocks* Don't run away from me when you're flushing like that, you make me hard *whispers against his hear* What... *licks his earlobe* is... *sucks it* this...? *slips a finger between Zero's buttocks until finding the white string*
Z: *gasps and twists in Kaname's arms* Just a... *moans* ...uh... a tampon *grips Kaname's shoulders*
K: *pulls away a bit and looks Zero in the eye, blinking* A... tampon? For... what?
Z: *at the verge of exploding from flushing* 'coz when we...eh... make love...uh...you... *swallows hard*
K: * raises an eyebrow with crooked smile before dipping his head again to Zero's ear* Am I big and you want to stretch yourself with a tampon... for me? *licks his neck, slips his hands down Zero's back and pulls out the tampon*
Z:*jerks and gasps*
K: *thrusts his hips upwards to make Zero feel how hard is he, scratches the other's neck with his fangs and inserts one long finger in Zero's tight entrance* Um... I like it... Effective... Saves time...
Z: *moans hard*
K: *reaches Zero's arousal with the other hand while prepping him* Next time... buy an XL tampon... I'm... big....
Z: *inhales sharply as Kaname strokes him and then yelps slightly as the pureblood proves just how big*
K: *presses Zero's back to the door and lifts him, a hand under each thigh as he thrusts up carefully into the flushing hunter, finding him nicely stretched* Ah... yes... very effective... *kisses Zero's neck*
Z: *red as a beet and physically incapable of flushing any deeper, holds onto Kaname's shoulders with a groan of pleasure* T-this is actually kinda... ahh... counter productive... AAh... to why I was actually... AAH... *abandons useless and distracting effort to talk and pushes back against Kaname, wrapping his knees tightly around his hips as he's pushed rhythmically against the door*
K: *Quizzical and breathless* Hm? No, no, I think it was very productive, actually. Although, of course, we'll have to test it out thoroughly... *wicked grin*
Z: T-test? *can barely think, clinging to Kaname tightly*
K: *holding on just as tightly* Yes, you know... here... and on the bed... have to try it a couple times to see how well the tampon worked.
Z: *decides to not bother explaining and kisses Kaname instead* Insatiable twit. *a long time of energetic thrusting and love making ensue*
*****NEXT MORNING*****
Z: *in the bathroom, finds that his... uh... dripping problem is twice as bad due to how many times Kaname... er... filled him...* Crap!
K: *still contentedly curled up in bed* What?
Z: *completely red* NOTHING! *makes mental note on his to-do list for the day... "buy XL tampons..."*


*peeks out from her hiding place under the couch, trying to see if she's about to get spitted or not* LOL well, there you go. If you haven't had your RDA of insanity for the week yet, there's a triple helping for ya. ;) *continues hiding to avoid being hideously murdered by Zero*

In case anyone is wondering, I am very close to finishing the next chapter of "Secrets in the Dark". Sorry it's taking so long. I have to go out pretty soon and will be busy a lot of this afternoon, so I don't know if I'm going to be able to finish it, do review responses and post today, but if not, it will be coming as soon as I am able to.

And on a totally random note, I have got to stop watching sad anime, it's taking a serious toll on my tissue stock, which I need to keep well maintained for my fic reading, LOL. Possible spoiler warnings for random anime's ahead, don't read the next couple paragraphs if you don't want to risk reading spoilers.

Of course, usually I don't realize its going to be sad until it's too late. XD One exception is "Death Note", which I just finished watching. I had a pretty good idea it was going to be kinda sad because of the premise, but I didn't realize that they were going to make me cry for the deaths of both the protagonist and the antagonist. ("hero" and "villain" terms get really confusing to try to use for that series, LOL, since the "hero" (ie, person whose story you're following) is actually also the "villain"). XD I had to seriously reach for the tissues when L died and then, even though I spent most of the series rooting for his downfall... I still managed to cry all over again when Light finally died too. Go figure. *shakes head* (Oh, and that's not even counting crying over the deaths of other semi-main characters like Light's dad, etc... that show was epic for people dying :S).

But some catch you totally by surprise. I also recently finished watching an anime called "Tactics" which was a light hearted / supernatural series, or at least that's how it started... and then it up and pulled a "sixth sense" kind of twist at the end and decided to make me cry through most of the last episode. 0_0 Seriously... *looks at her wiped out tissue stock* really gotta stop with the sad anime. *nods*

Although I did have to laugh at one thing in Tactics because it took my little brain straight to Vampire Knight. One of the guy's names is Haruka, and a couple of times people comment on that being a kind of girly name. *snickers*

Now, the first place I heard that name was in Vampire Knight (Haruka Kuran), so I'm like... it is? I'm sure people more in the know already know this, but I'm slow and I didn't, so I looked it up and apparently Haruka can be either a boy or girl name. Which amused me highly for some reason because I already knew that Kaname can also be a boy or girl name. *glances at Ms. Hino and raises her eyebrows* Hmm... she seems to be liking the unisex names for male members of the Kuran family. LOL I looked up Rido too, but I couldn't find anywhere that told me if that was a unisex name as well or not.

How sad is it that that little innocuous fact about their names is almost enough to give me pervy fic bunnies? LOL *shakes head at herself*

Okay, well, enough rambling and making your eyes and ears bleed, I have to get going. Hope everyone's having a great weekend!

Posted by Blackened Wing at 10:12 AM | Permalink | Comments

Weekend was jam packed with holiday related stuff, but I managed to get the first chapter of my next Kaname and Zero story ready for posting, so here it is!

__________________

Secrets in the Dark
by Blackened Wing

Rating: M

Summary: There are things in Kaname's past he would rather forget, and some he's forgotten too well. When past and present collide, old wounds are ripped open, leaving Kaname frighteningly vulnerable and Zero scrambling to pick up the pieces. Yaoi. Non-con.

Warnings: Yaoi, (slash, male/male), non-con / rape, young person abuse. Established relationship between Kaname and Zero. DO NOT READ if any of these elements might disturb you.

Pairings: Zero x Kaname, Kaname x Zero, OC x Kaname (non-con)

Series: This story is part of the Duet Series, which follows Kaname and Zero and their relationship as based off of my stories "Crimson Door" and "Blood Moon". This story takes place a couple years after "Take the Lead". See my bio for a full listing of stories in the series.

For full info, disclaimers and notes, please see the header of the story itself over on FFN.

READ THE STORY HERE
__________________

This is the fic I've been promising for a while which will deal with some of the secrets in Kaname's past that have been hinted at in various places throughout my other stories. Some of you may remember that I did a trailer for this story a while ago. If you haven't seen it and you want to, you can see it here.

There is a song that goes really well with this story - just how well may not even be apparent yet until later on in the story. It's Linkin Park's "Easier to Run"

It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

Something has been taken from deep inside of me
The secret I've kept locked away no one can ever see
Wounds so deep they never show they never go away
Like moving pictures in my head for years and years they've played


If I could change I would, take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
If I could take all the shame to the grave I would

If I could change I would, take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
I would take all my shame to the grave...

It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

Sometimes I remember the darkness of my past
Bringing back these memories I wish I didn't have
Sometimes I think of letting go and never looking back
And never moving forward so there'd never be a past

If I could change I would, take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
If I could take all the shame to the grave I would

If I could change I would, take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
I would take all my shame to the grave

Just washing it aside
All of the helplessness inside
Pretending I don't feel misplaced
It's so much simpler than change

It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

It's easier to run
If I could change I would take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made

It's easier to go
If I could change I would take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would

I would take all my shame to the grave

Listen to it:


So, anyway, first chapter has been posted, hopefully you all will like it. It's a somewhat short chapter, but it's kind of scene setting. I'm working on the next one, but I will be going out of town this upcoming Weds. and will be back next Tuesday, so the next chapter won't be until sometime after that.

Once again, my appologies to everyone who is still patiently waiting and waiting for me to catch up with my reviewing, responses and mails. I'm hoping things will slow down a little for me again as this month progresses and I'll be able to start catching up. *keeps fingers crossed hopefully*

There have been a lot of other wonderful fanfiction happening the past few weeks as well. I have a number of fics waiting for me to read them and I will probably add them after I've had a chance to do so, but for now, here's some of the fics that I follow which have been recently updated and some new ones that have been added to the fanfic page.

UPDATED:
The Other Half of Myself - YenGirl
The Stranger - LightPathetic
Cradle of Blood - Sagakure
Cookies - Nineorchids
Assorted Sweets - Clue-Sama
Silhouette Serenade - Clue-Sama

NEW:
In a Whisper - AmidA
A Peculiarly Pureblood Problem - somewhere-there
Storm in a Teacup - YenGirl
Together Again - YenGirl
Entwined - Eilara
Life Lessons - Carapheonix
Old Scabs & Menoetius - Good Evening
Winter's Chill - Kafunshou Queen

EDIT:
EEP! Somehow YenGirl's wonderfully AWESOME Kaname x Zero x Yuki threesome fic "Together Again" went missing from my update list. *round, horrified eyes* I have now added it to the list and the fanfic links page! Suuuuch a good story. :)

You can find the links to all these fics and others on my Vampire Knight Fanfiction page.

Labels: fanfiction, hurt / comfort, kaname non-con, kaname rape, kaname x zero, secrets in the dark, vampire knight fanfiction, zero x kaname

Posted by Blackened Wing at 7:52 PM | Permalink | Comments