My Vampire Heart

Weekend was jam packed with holiday related stuff, but I managed to get the first chapter of my next Kaname and Zero story ready for posting, so here it is!

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Secrets in the Dark
by Blackened Wing

Rating: M

Summary: There are things in Kaname's past he would rather forget, and some he's forgotten too well. When past and present collide, old wounds are ripped open, leaving Kaname frighteningly vulnerable and Zero scrambling to pick up the pieces. Yaoi. Non-con.

Warnings: Yaoi, (slash, male/male), non-con / rape, young person abuse. Established relationship between Kaname and Zero. DO NOT READ if any of these elements might disturb you.

Pairings: Zero x Kaname, Kaname x Zero, OC x Kaname (non-con)

Series: This story is part of the Duet Series, which follows Kaname and Zero and their relationship as based off of my stories "Crimson Door" and "Blood Moon". This story takes place a couple years after "Take the Lead". See my bio for a full listing of stories in the series.

For full info, disclaimers and notes, please see the header of the story itself over on FFN.

READ THE STORY HERE
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This is the fic I've been promising for a while which will deal with some of the secrets in Kaname's past that have been hinted at in various places throughout my other stories. Some of you may remember that I did a trailer for this story a while ago. If you haven't seen it and you want to, you can see it here.

There is a song that goes really well with this story - just how well may not even be apparent yet until later on in the story. It's Linkin Park's "Easier to Run"

It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

Something has been taken from deep inside of me
The secret I've kept locked away no one can ever see
Wounds so deep they never show they never go away
Like moving pictures in my head for years and years they've played


If I could change I would, take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
If I could take all the shame to the grave I would

If I could change I would, take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
I would take all my shame to the grave...

It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

Sometimes I remember the darkness of my past
Bringing back these memories I wish I didn't have
Sometimes I think of letting go and never looking back
And never moving forward so there'd never be a past

If I could change I would, take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
If I could take all the shame to the grave I would

If I could change I would, take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
I would take all my shame to the grave

Just washing it aside
All of the helplessness inside
Pretending I don't feel misplaced
It's so much simpler than change

It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

It's easier to run
If I could change I would take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made

It's easier to go
If I could change I would take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would

I would take all my shame to the grave

Listen to it:


So, anyway, first chapter has been posted, hopefully you all will like it. It's a somewhat short chapter, but it's kind of scene setting. I'm working on the next one, but I will be going out of town this upcoming Weds. and will be back next Tuesday, so the next chapter won't be until sometime after that.

Once again, my appologies to everyone who is still patiently waiting and waiting for me to catch up with my reviewing, responses and mails. I'm hoping things will slow down a little for me again as this month progresses and I'll be able to start catching up. *keeps fingers crossed hopefully*

There have been a lot of other wonderful fanfiction happening the past few weeks as well. I have a number of fics waiting for me to read them and I will probably add them after I've had a chance to do so, but for now, here's some of the fics that I follow which have been recently updated and some new ones that have been added to the fanfic page.

UPDATED:
The Other Half of Myself - YenGirl
The Stranger - LightPathetic
Cradle of Blood - Sagakure
Cookies - Nineorchids
Assorted Sweets - Clue-Sama
Silhouette Serenade - Clue-Sama

NEW:
In a Whisper - AmidA
A Peculiarly Pureblood Problem - somewhere-there
Storm in a Teacup - YenGirl
Together Again - YenGirl
Entwined - Eilara
Life Lessons - Carapheonix
Old Scabs & Menoetius - Good Evening
Winter's Chill - Kafunshou Queen

EDIT:
EEP! Somehow YenGirl's wonderfully AWESOME Kaname x Zero x Yuki threesome fic "Together Again" went missing from my update list. *round, horrified eyes* I have now added it to the list and the fanfic links page! Suuuuch a good story. :)

You can find the links to all these fics and others on my Vampire Knight Fanfiction page.

Labels: fanfiction, hurt / comfort, kaname non-con, kaname rape, kaname x zero, secrets in the dark, vampire knight fanfiction, zero x kaname

Posted by Blackened Wing at 7:52 PM | Permalink | Comments

If you ever played Candy Land as a child and kept getting bounced back near the end and stuck in the Molasses Swamp, losing turn after turn, then that's a pretty good analogy for how I feel at the moment. :P

I am sooooo behind on everything, emails, reviews, responses... wait, I think it would be shorter to list what I'm not behind on...

*crickets*

...yeah, okay, can't think of anything.

Well, my apologies to everyone and thanks for your patience. If I haven't answered or responded to you, please know that it's only because life has been so stupid lately.

Right. Enough of that. In slightly more on topic news, I am working on getting the first chapter of my next VK story together and ready for posting (the one that comes after "Take the Lead" and "Blood Moon" in my Duet (KxZ / ZxK) series).

I finally have a name for it, I'm calling it "Secrets in the Dark" :) Which will hopefully seem more appropriate and less melodramatic when you actually read the first chapter. LOL

Unfortunately, it's probably still going to be a little bit before I start posting. This upcoming weekend is iffy because of the holiday, and I'm going to be away part of next week and the weekend. But if I am not able to before, then I will post shortly after I get back. We'll see if I'm able to get it together to post at least the first chapter before I go though. *keeps fingers crossed and scowls daggers at the never ending mountain of work on her desk*

Posted by Blackened Wing at 3:39 PM | Permalink | Comments

Chapter 51 of the Vampire Knight Manga is out! Once again it has been translated by the wonderful Sagakure. :) You can find it on her site, and also on One Manga.

Read VK Chapter 51 on SGK's LJ
Read VK Chapter 51 on OneManga


SPOILERS AHEAD



It was a nice chapter, I enjoyed it. It was good to find out what was happening with Cross Academy over the past year and how the whole Rido incident was dealt with and covered up. I had been quite worried for the school's future, but it's great to know that it's still going strong, even if sadly, sans Night Class. So cute that Yagari had to play headmaster while Cross was away, heheh somehow I think he had a lot less patience for administrative stuff than Cross does, although of course, he's got plenty of experience as a teacher. ;)

Also cool that he and Cross are sort of co-presidents of the HA for now, until Zero's old enough / ready. Well, Cross is apparently pres in title (yay!) and Yagari is the one actually taking care of business, at least if Yagari is to be believed. *chuckles*

I liked Zero's conversation with Yori and the two other Day Class kids too. I can't help but notice that although he's giving them the "be careful of vampires" line, he actually admits that "there are vampires who aren't enemies". :D Not quite the same as saying that there might actually be good vampires, but hey, a step in the right direction, no? ;)

Also, for no particularly good reason I was quite pleased at the mention of hunter charms. LOL Probably because I use hunter charms in my stories and they aren't often mentioned in the Manga. So anyway, yeah, sometimes it's the little things that amuse me.

Okay. I might just DIE from cuteness at the young Kaname / little Yuki flashback. Dang, Kaname looks so cute laying on the couch with his book like that and Yuki is just adorable all cuddled up and sitting on him. The conversation they have there and the whole scene is just LOVELY and probably one of my favorite parts of the chapter. :)

LOL! I also loved and giggled over (although I probably shouldn't have giggled because it was serious, but it was just... I don't know, giggle worthy) the part where Yuki (back in the present) gets all distracted and goes into blood thirst thinking about Kaname's neck. Heheh maybe it's so fun because it's totally the feeling I get thinking of Kaname, just... without the blood part... ;D

Yuki and Aido interactions were fun as always. :) LOL and I am MASSIVELY intrigued by the doors with the crest on them that Yuki said smelled faintly of Kaname.

The scene at the end when Kaname comes home and he and Yuki talk is also so lovely. I really like that Yuki is starting to be able to voice her feelings out a little more, even if she doesn't know what to do with them. It can't be easy having her heart calling for both her loves. It was a really touching moment when she admitted to Kaname that part of her heart was still attached to Zero, yet she wants so much to be by Kaname's side always. Kaname's acceptance of that and of her is really sweet. Honestly... *dreamy sigh* I mean, he's so accepting, and Yuki's as much as admitted that she wants/needs them both... *drags Zero over and tries to push them into a threesome* 0:D

*cough* right, where was I? Oh yes, the chapter. The chapter was very enjoyable. There's a lot more stuff that I've not mentioned, but this isn't really supposed to be a summary, this is just me rambling about it LOL. I already can't wait for the next one!

Labels: vampire knight 51, vampire knight 51 scanlated, vampire knight chapter 51, vampire knight chapter 51 scanlation, vampire knight manga chapter 51, vk 51

Posted by Blackened Wing at 5:36 PM | Permalink | Comments

Was gone over the weekend and most of yesterday and am now trying to catch up with everything in work, life and online... and as usual, am failing. LOL

Sorry to everyone to whom I owe emails, review responses, reviews, etc. I'm massively behind on everything and probably won't be catching up very quickly, but I am trying.

I'm soooo tired, I feel like I haven't slept in a week. Not sure why, I didn't get much sleep last night, but it didn't seem extreme enough to warrant how hard it is right now to keep my eyes open. *yawn* I must have jet lag or something. *starts dozing on her desk before jerking back awake* Okay! So, enough of that, nobody wants to hear how tired I am, LOL including me.

I just saw that Sagakure has posted a summary of the next chapter of Vampire Knight (51) on her LJ. She'll be doing the scanlation as usual *bounces in super grateful happiness* when LaLa comes out here, which should be fairly soonish. The summary is here: http://sagakure.livejournal.com/331893.html

I'm wavering indecisively back and forth on whether to read or not. I usually like to read the chapter as a whole and not be spoilered first, but... LOL I think my resistance is quite low right now *contentedly will-power-less grin* so I shall probably go read it. :D

And then maybe take a nap. Dang, so sleepy... zzzzz

Posted by Blackened Wing at 7:58 PM | Permalink | Comments

I finished the last two pictures in my "Elemental Love" series. In case it's been so long no one remembers, that's a series of pics I've been doing of Kaname and Zero in various, um... amorous poses :D They're loosely tied together by the Elemental theme of Water, Fire, Earth and Air. I've already done Water and Fire. So now I've finished Earth and Air.

WARNING - these pictures contain adult content - graphic yaoi (male/male sex) and nudity. If that disturbs you at all or if you're too young in your country of residence to be viewing such images then DO NOT CLICK ON THE THUMBNAILS FOR THE FULL SIZED VERSIONS. DO NOT LOOK. Okay? DON'T!

I also have "safe" versions of these pictures posted on Deviant Art too. STILL yaoi, so stay away if that's not your cup of tea, but there's no naughty bits showing in those versions.

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Elemental Love - Earth - Zero x Kaname

View the "Safe" version on Deviant Art

View the decidedly un-safe version by clicking on the thumbnail:


Mwahahah! Couldn't resist letting our boys mess around in the mud and get themselves all dirty... (kind of like my mind) ;D Set up I had in mind here is that it's after one of Kaname and Zero's private outdoor sparring matches where adrenaline and competition blossomed into something more delightful afterwards. ;) Hehe I think Kaname lost... although maybe he wanted to. Mild bondage warnings, but it's mostly playful.

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Elemental Love - Air - Kaname x Zero

View the "Safe" version on Deviant Art

View the decidedly un-safe version by clicking on the thumbnail:


Had fun with the lighting in this one, although I think I screwed it up in a few places. Am also incredibly anxious about Zero's bit of, um anatomy that's showing. I'm not very good at trying to draw that kind of thing and tried to leave it out but it looked wrong. So I put it in, but it probably still looks wrong. *sighs* I really wanted to do them in this pose though. :) Although from the way their expressions turned out it kinda looks like they might have just finished, so I probably should have put some, um... moisture... in there, but I certainly couldn't figure out how to do that without it looking weird. :D
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Previous "Elemental Love" Pictures:
(all warnings from above apply)

Elemental Love - Water - Zero x Kaname
Elemental Love - Fire - Kaname x Zero

Labels: elemental love, elemental love air, elemental love earth, kaname x zero yaoi pictures, zero x kaname bondage, zero x kaname vine bondage, zero x kaname yaoi pictures

Posted by Blackened Wing at 7:39 PM | Permalink | Comments

Alrighty then! Finished up that missing / deleted scene that I promised from "Take the Lead". :D Veeeery lemony. Heck, whole thing is one long (hopefully not sucky or overdone) lemon.

My "little" one-shot ended up about 16 pages long... LOL so once again I totally fail at writing anything that can actually be called "short". ;)

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Take Me
by Blackened Wing

Rating: M

Summary: Zero cursed in breathless ecstasy, half reclined on the grass, support arm trembling and fingers knotted tightly in Kaname's raven hair as the pureblood knelt immovably between his legs with a tender smile. MISSING SCENE from "Take the Lead". Yaoi Lemon.

Warnings: Graphic Yaoi Lemon, male/male sex and romance, established relationship between Kaname and Zero. If any of that bothers you, stop reading right now. Seriously. If you don't like Yaoi, or the thought of these two guys together, there is nothing of interest for you in this fic. If, however, you're obsessed like me... XD

Pairings: Kaname x Zero

Series: This story is part of the Duet Series, which follows Kaname and Zero and their relationship as based off of my story "Crimson Door". This story is a "missing scene" from my fic "Take the Lead."

Full header and disclaimer information can be found on the story itself.

READ IT ON FANFICTION.NET

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The title just seemed to fit with some of the events in the fic. ;D And kind of loosely ties back to "Take the Lead" too, or at least, it was supposed to, LOL.

Random note in case anyone actually cares - the "teaser" snippet in the summary is worded differently in the fic itself, but you only have 255 characters allowed in an FFN summary, sooo... yeah, adjustments are necessary. :)

Labels: kaname x zero, kaname x zero fanfiction, kaname x zero lemon, lemon, Take Me, Take the Lead, Take the Lead bonus scene, yaoi lemon, zero x kaname

Posted by Blackened Wing at 2:11 PM | Permalink | Comments

Just posted the last chapter of my fluffy little Kaname x Zero Datefic "Take the Lead"

Take the Lead (Kaname x Zero - by Blackened Wing)
Chapter Seven: "Lead Me, Follow Me, Love Me"


There will be a little (or not so little... *eyes its growing length in concern*) bonus story that covers the, uh... non-T rated scene near the end of the date where this one fades to black and goes on to the Epilogue. ;) Originally, I was going to post it here on my blog, and I still might, but if it gets much longer (which it also might) then I'll probably turn it into a one-shot story over on fanfiction.net, as that would probably be easier for people to read. We'll see what happens.

Next story on my plate is the one I did the Trailer for a little while ago, where we find out about some secrets in Kaname's past that have been hinted at throughout my other stories. :) *angst alert sounds*

Thank you again to everyone who read, reviewed and enjoyed "Take the Lead"! You all are the reason I write. :)


And in other totally wonderful fanfic updates...


UPDATED FICS:
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Cookies - Nineorchids (LOVE the twist that's happened in this!)
What Could Almost Be - YenGirl (Awesome as always!!)
The Stranger - LightPathetic (gets award for AU premise I would never have thought of but adore XD)
Assorted Sweets - Clue-Sama (KYAAA! CUTENESS!)
Silhouette Serenade - Clue-Sama (Can't wait to see what happens)
Rose for the Dead - Withered Black Rose (Mysteries, mysteries!)

NEW OR NEWLY ADDED FICS:
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A Fleeting Moment - YenGirl
(Loooooovely, angsty, sweet Aido x Kaname fic! If you haven't read it, go do so! Now. LOL *grins and hides from Yen, trying to push the trumpeters back behind the bushes again before she catches them*)

Links to all these fics can be found in the Vampire Knight Fanfic Section

Labels: aido x kaname fanfiction, fanfiction updates, kaname x zero fanfiction, Take the Lead, vampire knight fanfiction, vampire knight yaoi fanfiction

Posted by Blackened Wing at 11:50 AM | Permalink | Comments